I leave to neuro, disappointed. I see them again in 3 months.
I go upstairs to the ENT. I didn't want to disturb the doc, so I wait for the nurse to go out and to give it to her. So I wait then a doc I recognise came buy , I smiled and ask if doc Harv is in. Just an excuse to open the door. Then I give the nurse the scans and wait outside.
The doc asks me in. He says the scans are all screwed up. Hmm yeah, they are. But the latest is April 29. There. and the latest CT 6th May, here. I ask about the growth and he says that it's discharge...fluid. And the nasal? Leftovers from his handy work. So I'm ok? Yeah. Woohoo.
Maybe I will see more of my daughter's birthdays...I hope.
I feel better. I ask if the onkologist called, nope. Where's the scan reports...hm...gone. HKL took them. Bugger, I have scans of the reports, I'll bring to the next appointment, next month.
So I leave.
Man I need to hassle the onkologist, she said she would call them. Should have guessed, nothing.
Monday, June 22, 2009
neuro who?
I was going to see the neuro today. I imagine looking at my scans that I will go straight to the ward. Wouldn't that be a laugh. Yeah.
Wonder which neuro I will see. I go in and I get someone I have never met before. He knows nothing about my case and it showed. You still leaking? No. What a disappointment. Is there a chance of fits. "There's always a chance, doesn't mean you'll get it though." Great, uncertainty till the day I die, then it will be certain. Have you heard of vitamin b17. Wass that, no, believe in contemporary medicine. Everything else is crack pot. Man I hate this guy already. Attitudes like this will keep medicine where it is now, slow. Do whatever the onkologist say. Did the radiologist call? Donno.
Have you seen my scan? It's grown everywhere! Then he shuffles through it. We only deal with the brain. There's some leftovers, let the onkologist deal with it.
...???...
What a waste of time. Wish I had gotten any of the other doctors, this guy was useless.
Wonder which neuro I will see. I go in and I get someone I have never met before. He knows nothing about my case and it showed. You still leaking? No. What a disappointment. Is there a chance of fits. "There's always a chance, doesn't mean you'll get it though." Great, uncertainty till the day I die, then it will be certain. Have you heard of vitamin b17. Wass that, no, believe in contemporary medicine. Everything else is crack pot. Man I hate this guy already. Attitudes like this will keep medicine where it is now, slow. Do whatever the onkologist say. Did the radiologist call? Donno.
Have you seen my scan? It's grown everywhere! Then he shuffles through it. We only deal with the brain. There's some leftovers, let the onkologist deal with it.
...???...
What a waste of time. Wish I had gotten any of the other doctors, this guy was useless.
my last raya
At this rate I am certainly going to die soon. Man only after so months it's everywhere.
I feel sad not being able to see my daughter grow up, have birthdays.
Certainly this will be my last raya.
I feel sad not being able to see my daughter grow up, have birthdays.
Certainly this will be my last raya.
shaking the apple tree
In order to get any fruits sometimes you have to shake the tree. Something may fall.
I had to see the neuro on Monday and I ask HKL if I could pick up my scans. They say sure. I go on friday. While here I tried to get an update on my case after all it has been almost 2 MONTHS since the 'we will call you'. Man I could die before treatment.
The counter says, ask in room 1, the planning room. So I go there, ask about the scans and my case. The guy calls the doctor and then says she wants to see me, please wait. So I wait. The doc comes in and gives me the low down. Here's what we got. You have something here behind your right cheek, something suspicious on the right nostril near your eye and leftovers in your brain. The bulk near your eye...if low dose you'll get cataracts cos it's sensitive and at high dose, well no more stereo vision. We'll need your permission. I do the usual smile and lightheartedness. Man this is what you can give me after 2 MONTHS+. This scan is almost 2 months ago. It's probably grown more by then. Fuck what are you waiting for! I will need some input from Mr Cheang or Dr Harvinder. OK. Thanks.
So I leave.
I had to see the neuro on Monday and I ask HKL if I could pick up my scans. They say sure. I go on friday. While here I tried to get an update on my case after all it has been almost 2 MONTHS since the 'we will call you'. Man I could die before treatment.
The counter says, ask in room 1, the planning room. So I go there, ask about the scans and my case. The guy calls the doctor and then says she wants to see me, please wait. So I wait. The doc comes in and gives me the low down. Here's what we got. You have something here behind your right cheek, something suspicious on the right nostril near your eye and leftovers in your brain. The bulk near your eye...if low dose you'll get cataracts cos it's sensitive and at high dose, well no more stereo vision. We'll need your permission. I do the usual smile and lightheartedness. Man this is what you can give me after 2 MONTHS+. This scan is almost 2 months ago. It's probably grown more by then. Fuck what are you waiting for! I will need some input from Mr Cheang or Dr Harvinder. OK. Thanks.
So I leave.
ENT the dragon
OK he's not a dragon but I kinda like Dr Harvinder. Don't know why, maybe because of his simplicity.
"Did you bring your scan?" asked the nurse. What? You called a few weeks ago looking for it, I say where it was (downstairs at neuro) and you didn't get it? Man.
I go in, I get a squirt, a get poked in the nostril, see what could be seen. Hmm a little booger, suck it out. "No sign of leakage". That's it, I see you in a month. I love this doctor.
I promise to bring my scans when I see the neuro next week. Bye.
That's it. How simple is that?
"Did you bring your scan?" asked the nurse. What? You called a few weeks ago looking for it, I say where it was (downstairs at neuro) and you didn't get it? Man.
I go in, I get a squirt, a get poked in the nostril, see what could be seen. Hmm a little booger, suck it out. "No sign of leakage". That's it, I see you in a month. I love this doctor.
I promise to bring my scans when I see the neuro next week. Bye.
That's it. How simple is that?
this time lucky ... or unlucky
So this time I have completed all the prerequisites, the 8hr and 2hr steroids, no food. She says OK. Yay. Wonder why I wasn't worried at all about the contrast solution, it didn't enter my head (I'm gonna pay for this). So I go in. I lay on the 'bed'. They were about to roll me into the machine but the orderly mentioned the IV line. OK. They say please wait for the doctor. So I wait. I drop my arms to let the blood flow down to enlarge my veins. It should help a little (it didn't though). I look at my hands. It's been poked too much and there didn't seem to be any 'live' veins left. Wonder where they will poke me.
The doctor comes and she looks at my hands. She asks if I wanted it in the hands or the elbow. I said hands will do. I feel the alcohol swab at the pinky end of my left hand. I've had a failed attempt there so I was not keen on it but what can I do? I just had to lump it. I feel the sting of the needle and the ache of the discovery ( ie trying to get it in the vein - more like capillary if you ask me). She then tries the test, injecting a saline solution to test if it goes in ... or not. She asks if it hurts, yeah ... YEAH. Man it DID. Oh god that hurts. She looks at my left hand looking for another candidate. Then drops it for my right hand. I feel the swab, it was the biggest 'capillary' there. So I was sort of glad, this should go in. She pokes it and I felt it. Then she injects. I say Oh, whats that? She asks, that hurts? YEAH.
Man I felt like crying. Let me out please, I wanna go home. Timeout. There goes my macho image. Sob...sob.
Then she went for the jugular, the elbow. The vein there was large. What did I do to deserve this. God help me ... oh I forgot to say a little prayer then I recited the salawat 3 times. This time I felt the sting and the ache, but felt the squirt of the saline solution going in. Thank god.
Man I will never let anyone try the pinky end of my left hand again. Will opt for the jugular next time.
(It just occurred to me that they didn't constrict my arm to enlarge the veins when they tried the IV line, they always did that when I was at Ipoh. Man I would rather be at Ipoh RPB hospital if this was a sample of their treatment.)
The scan was the usual scan. Then the contrast solution. The nurse say injecting. I felt something entering my veins, then my throat felt warm and tingly, not nice more like glowing from radiation tingle. Then around my groin then around my stomach. Now I know why they were so strict on the steroids. It was a struggle to ignore the feeling around my throat to stop from vomiting. It felt like someone was poking me in the back of the throat. Then I had the mask which I did before placed on my head, and it was over.
I can go. You will get another Xray before your radiotherapy begins. We will call you (yeah right).
The doctor comes and she looks at my hands. She asks if I wanted it in the hands or the elbow. I said hands will do. I feel the alcohol swab at the pinky end of my left hand. I've had a failed attempt there so I was not keen on it but what can I do? I just had to lump it. I feel the sting of the needle and the ache of the discovery ( ie trying to get it in the vein - more like capillary if you ask me). She then tries the test, injecting a saline solution to test if it goes in ... or not. She asks if it hurts, yeah ... YEAH. Man it DID. Oh god that hurts. She looks at my left hand looking for another candidate. Then drops it for my right hand. I feel the swab, it was the biggest 'capillary' there. So I was sort of glad, this should go in. She pokes it and I felt it. Then she injects. I say Oh, whats that? She asks, that hurts? YEAH.
Man I felt like crying. Let me out please, I wanna go home. Timeout. There goes my macho image. Sob...sob.
Then she went for the jugular, the elbow. The vein there was large. What did I do to deserve this. God help me ... oh I forgot to say a little prayer then I recited the salawat 3 times. This time I felt the sting and the ache, but felt the squirt of the saline solution going in. Thank god.
Man I will never let anyone try the pinky end of my left hand again. Will opt for the jugular next time.
(It just occurred to me that they didn't constrict my arm to enlarge the veins when they tried the IV line, they always did that when I was at Ipoh. Man I would rather be at Ipoh RPB hospital if this was a sample of their treatment.)
The scan was the usual scan. Then the contrast solution. The nurse say injecting. I felt something entering my veins, then my throat felt warm and tingly, not nice more like glowing from radiation tingle. Then around my groin then around my stomach. Now I know why they were so strict on the steroids. It was a struggle to ignore the feeling around my throat to stop from vomiting. It felt like someone was poking me in the back of the throat. Then I had the mask which I did before placed on my head, and it was over.
I can go. You will get another Xray before your radiotherapy begins. We will call you (yeah right).
third time lucky
Ok so third time to try get this CT simulation thing happening.
I had just moved from Perak and arrived late plus the removalist made an opportunistic detour to get some other things along the way. I called some friends, thanks guys L - M & Mr O (phew, lucky MrO is O if C I would get Larry Curly and Mo :D ), to help lift the big stuff, fridges, sofa etc. Man if they had not helped I would've blown my nasal hole cap ie leaked again. Thanks for waiting till 12 man. Man it'll be my treat for tea tarik when, if EVER I get money from my current project.
Thus, I forgot to take my 8hr before, steroids. Next day I had just remembered about it and took the 2hr before. Blah blah blah, I see the girl and she asked about the steroids. I said I forgot the 8hr but took the 2hr. She said one minute I will ask the doctor. She comes back and said nope. Huh. That wasn't what I had imagined would happened. Man I've taken contrast solutions before, how bad can it be!
She said come back tomorrow, get more pills and don't forget to eat them.
Man that was disappointing.
I had just moved from Perak and arrived late plus the removalist made an opportunistic detour to get some other things along the way. I called some friends, thanks guys L - M & Mr O (phew, lucky MrO is O if C I would get Larry Curly and Mo :D ), to help lift the big stuff, fridges, sofa etc. Man if they had not helped I would've blown my nasal hole cap ie leaked again. Thanks for waiting till 12 man. Man it'll be my treat for tea tarik when, if EVER I get money from my current project.
Thus, I forgot to take my 8hr before, steroids. Next day I had just remembered about it and took the 2hr before. Blah blah blah, I see the girl and she asked about the steroids. I said I forgot the 8hr but took the 2hr. She said one minute I will ask the doctor. She comes back and said nope. Huh. That wasn't what I had imagined would happened. Man I've taken contrast solutions before, how bad can it be!
She said come back tomorrow, get more pills and don't forget to eat them.
Man that was disappointing.
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