a new spring

It was spring a few weeks ago. During autumn and winter the leaves falls off some trees. So much that I think them to be dead. Fortunately I was proven wrong. The plum tree sprouts white flowers that make them look like snow. When the wind blows them and they fall, they look like snow falling. Such is the beauty of having seasons.

Soon I will need another scan. And another checkup. Hope it all goes well.

another pebble in the river

It's been a while since I have updated this blog. Nothing much has happened. Ramadhan. Otherwise nothing.

I'm in maintenance mode waiting for the tumour to reoccur, somewhere. My last appointment was yesterday and there was nothing to report. He asks if I want to live in ignorance or be aware of the problem. There's nothing much one can do other than more radiation. I say I want to know, I want to see it coming. The doc suggests a scan in two months, a week before the next appointment.

I'll have to wait and see.

a mouse in the house

My uncle came over the other day. He left the door opened but closed the fly door. Unfortunately there was a hole near the floor and would you know it a mouse came in. Uninvited. I heard him trying to scratch out in the middle of the night. I hate mice.

Reminds me of a cheap hotel I stayed in one time. I was sleeping and I felt mice, lots of mice, clammering over me in bed like I was some kind of amusement park. I was shocked.

Next day, rat poison. That fixed them and it will fix it now.

I opened the door and told the mouse to go 'be free'. But instead the little bugger ran further into the house. The opened door was right in front of him. Well you brought it upon yourself.

I was living in fear thinking that the mouse might crawl over me. I kept the bedroom door closed at all times. It was, after all my sanctuary.

A few nights later I could hear him in the kitchen coughing. And later he was in bad shape cos he was lying in the kitchen but not dead. He would crawl and hide when he saw me. Then a day or two later I got the courage to get a broom and pan and sweep him out.

He was still alive (kinda cute little thing), I told him he had his chance to go, why didn't he take it, the door was opened. The next day he was gone. Never to be seen, but alas there are heaps more on the roof.

groupies

hey I have followers. A cute chickie and a faceless man.

How about that, I never had groupies before.

some light in the tunnel

I know that I will not beat this cancer. It's just too tenacious. However the growth in my neck has shrunk, by a lot. I wonder if it is dead or just shrunk. Radiation has limited life, if it were to regrow in my head I wonder what treatment will be used next, if any.

Hope it does not regrow in my head ... for a long time. As for the rest of my body, it has not been radiated yet, go for it :)

frustration

this lack of taste and smell is SO frustrating. My throat is also sore now and gum feels swollen. Chewing and eating is a chore rather than a luxury.

Imagine not being able to smell or taste food. Just chewing some textured thing in your mouth without any taste. It's hell.

I tried to fry an egg the other day and left the pan to warm up and forgot about it. I was wondering why the kitchen looked foggy. THE PAN! I couldn't smell the smoke. Man it could've caught fire!

last day

It was my last radio day. I was glad. I say goodbye to the staff and ask if they will be throwing the mask away. She says yes. Is it radioactive. No. Can I have it? Yes.

Cool, I say I will paint it black and find a cape, and wear my underwear on the outside.

I also see the dietitian. I got weighed and thank god I did not lose weight. I was home. She suggests more supplements. Not a problem. All I can think about was the tube. :)

Next step, get my mold.I went to the radio department and asked for my mold. Yep you can have it, take a seat for a moment. I get my mold as a souvenir and I was outa here.

Till the next appointment.